Happiness

“Excuse me, But isn’t it rather selfish & unempathic to put m happiness first”

I recently was asked this great question… 

Actually this is probably the most malicious myth about happiness at all!

But, it comes in several varieties… did you ever heart this before:
“In a world so full of suffering, you can be happy only if you’re callous and self-centered”⁠
“Happy people become wrapped up in their own pleasure! They’re complacent and uninterested in the world”.⁠

And just to make this clear right from the bottom: These are WRONG!!!!⁠

Studies show that, quite to the contrary, happier people are more likely to help other people, they’re more interested in social problems, they do more volunteer work, and they contribute more to charity. They’re less preoccupied with their personal problems.⁠

WHEN I’M FEELING HAPPY… I find it easier to notice other people’s problems… I feel that I have more energy to try to take action… I have the emotional wherewithal to tackle sad or difficult issues… and I’m not as preoccupied with myself… I feel more generous and forgiving. ⁠

 How about you? 

If you spend time with someone who exudes positivity, and you are more likely to feel positive… Hang with someone who acts like life’s number one victim, and guaranteed, Debbie downer is going to rub off on you. RIGHT OR WRONG?⁠

It is called EMOTIONAL CONTAGION… and it means the emotions of others can influence us. ⁠

So if happy people make other people happy, why is it that happy people are sometimes thought to be selfish?⁠

This myth that unhappiness is selfless and happiness is selfish is misguided.⁠
IN FACT It’s more selfless to act happy. ⁠
It takes energy, generosity and discipline to be “happy”, BUT yet everyone takes the happy person for granted.⁠

“ONE OF THE BEST WAYS TO MAKE YOURSELF HAPPY IS TO MAKE OTHER PEOPLE HAPPY; ⁠
ONE OF THE BEST WAYS TO MAKE OTHERS HAPPY IS TO BE HAPPY YOURSELF”⁠

Everyone accepts the first part of this phrase, but the second part is just as important!⁠

By making the effort to make yourself happier, you better equip yourself to make other people happier, as well. ⁠

IT’S NOT SELFISH TO TRY TO BE HAPPY… ⁠
HAPPINESS is your BIRTHRIGHT!⁠

With all my love. B.⁠

Facts about Happiness you might want to know...

Happiness takes work. Happy people are taken for granted because they are thought of as  naturally happy people or born happy, yet upbeat people have to work at being resilient, bouncing back, rising above, and staying positive. The outside world only sees the happy person and not the effort behind the scenes, so positive people don’t receive credit for creating their sunshine-like dispositions. “Happiness is a work ethic. You have to train your brain to be positive, just like you work out your body,”

what can I do to make sure I'm becoming the best version of myself_BLOGbyBIMAKO

Happy people are overlooked. If happy people are thought to be in selfish pursuit of their own fulfillment and pleasure, consider that the happy person often goes unnoticed. “No one is careful of (a happy person’s) feelings or tries to keep his spirits high,” Rubin says. “Because happy people seem self-sufficient, they become a cushion for others.”  The happy person is expected to lift others up.

Happiness doesn’t mean you lack empathy. Just because your smile lights up a room, doesn’t mean you are blind to the suffering going on in the world. You don’t have to sacrifice your happiness to show the world you are compassionate. “Just as eating your dinner doesn’t help starving children in India; being blue yourself doesn’t help unhappy people become happier,” Rubin says. In fact, happier people are better equipped to demonstrate their empathy and help people because their emotional tanks are full.  “When I’m feeling happy, I find it easier to notice other people’s problems. I have more energy to try to take action and I have the emotional wherewithal to tackle sad or difficult issues, and I’m not as preoccupied with myself. I feel more generous and forgiving,” Rubin says. There will always be tragic stories happening in the world, but empathy is better expressed with giving back and good deeds, than giving up your happiness in a show of support.

Happy people give back.  Happy people are more interested in social problems, more likely to do volunteer work and contribute to charity, according to Gallup Well-being polls. While unhappy people tend to socially withdraw and focus on themselves, happy people turn outward and are more available to help others. And when people give back it only enhances their happiness, says Harvey McKinnon, a nonprofit fundraising expert and author of The Power of Giving: How Giving Back Enriches Us All. “People are hard-wired to give, and when people give to others, it makes them feel better.” Turns out, one of the best ways to get happy in the first place is to do a selfless act—help other people be happy. Rubin calls it a splendid truth: “The best way to make yourself happy is to make others happy, and the best ways to make other people happy, is to be happy yourself.”

It occurs to me, that it’s quiet important to care & fill our own “cup” first… just because of the fact that no-one can pour from an empty cup!  so you want to make a difference in this world, care about yourself. Then… only then… you will be able to give  to others from a healthy and abundant place!

with all my love, Birgit

You got questions? Click this link and send me a message.

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How to calm down the s#%t

blog by mrs.bimako

Retrain your brain for a calmer life

We live in fast-paced times.

You could say stress is part of our daily life! Everyone has to cope with it. And most of the time we master the challenges of everyday life with flying colours, don’t we?

But do you know those moments when you don’t know where your head is anymore and you have the feeling “this will never change. It will stay like this forever”. These are the moments when we have “just had enough”. Hand on heart: Does this sound like someone you know?

 If you feel so stressed-out that you are overwhelmed trying to cope, anxious or even panic about your to-do list… then take a closer look at the following 7 strategies to retrain your brain and learn how to handle stress better & stay calm under any kind of pressure.

Did you know? Stress & Pressure can put the body into “fight or flight” mode – an age-old tactic you probably have heard about. However, this evolutionary process releases hormones that prepare the body for either “fight or flight” mode, to get you ready to either fight or run from danger. In this day and age, our massive daily stress triggers these fight or flight hormones…. even when we are not faced with life-threatening situations. Okay, to us it may feel like our life depends on giving that presentation at work… I know situations like this… But let’s be honest… it’s not holding exactly the same amount of danger as facing a wild sabre-toothed tiger…. is it?

So if we often feel anxious or even panicky, it could be an indication that our fight or flight mode is probably triggered too easily. In this case, wouldn’t it be helpful  to learn how to calm yourself down when you’re entering this state?

7 tips
how you can calm down under any kind of pressure

TAKE A DEEP BREATH … OR TWO

Breathing deeply and slowly triggers the body to stop releasing stress hormones and start to relax. Focusing on your breath can also help to distract your mind from whatever is bothering you so that you focus only on what is happening at the present moment…either around you, nor inside of you.

A wise man once said: ” If you are in your head, you are dead”. Well, it’s a little bit dramatic… but you may see the point of truth in there. If we are not aware what’s happening around us and – instead- are wrapped up in our To-Do-Lists and worries, then we are only functioning… then we are not really living at all. 

Let’s start practicing how to be more present and focus on our breathing, right away. Here is a simple but very effective exercise:

Close your eyes. Relax your shoulders and your lower jaw! Breathe in deeply through your nose –  all the way into your belly and not just your chest. Hold for a moment and breathe out slowly through your mouth. Take a few minutes just to breathe deeply. Inhale – Exhale – Repeat.  After some time you should find yourself feeling much calmer.

If you like I have written down my “3 best practice tips to tap into the present moment easily”. Just click here to have a look at the little article.

GO FOR A WALK IN NATURE

Exercise is just as important as sleep when it comes to keeping stress in check and dealing with external pressure. Exercise prompts the body to release those “feel good” hormones that help you to clear your mind. 

If you’re under pressure at work, just five minutes of fresh air and a change of scenery could help you to feel calmer and gain a new perspective on the situation – you’ll probably realise it’s not a case of life or death anyway.

If you’d like to read more about the benefits of a “Walk Outside” click here to find out how a walk outside can boost your health AND your success.

 

PRACTISE GRATITUDE 

Staying grateful for everything you have in your life – no matter how small – can keep things in perspective and help you to maintain a positive attitude

Studies have shown that people who keep a daily gratitude journal have lower levels of cortisol – the hormone responsible for stress. Try taking a few minutes at the end of each day to write down 5 things you feel thankful for and see how much better it makes you feel.

Writing a gratitude journal may seem difficult at first, I know. Grap a free copy of my “Gratitude Log For Inner Peace” simply by clicking this link.

SURROUND YOURSELF WITH PEOPLE WHO VALUE YOU

You probably have a few people in your life who can make you feel stressed just by being around them. While it’s not always possible to cut these people out of your life entirely, when you’re under pressure try to spend more time with friends and family who are helpful, positive, and will lift you up rather than drag you down.

But most of all: allow yourself to be proud of yourself! Remember your strengths, your achievements and your worth.

GET PLENTY OF SLEEP

Let’s be honest: Everything seems worse when you’ve haven’t had a good night’s sleep. Stress and anxiety can often lead to insomnia so you end up in a vicious cycle – not being able to sleep and then feeling worse because you haven’t had enough sleep.

Make sleep a priority, especially if you’re under a lot of pressure. Create a sleep routine, that helps you to calm down. What about creating a spa like bedtime routine that helps you to relaxe? Probably you are the typ of person that enjoys guided meditations that help you to drift into sleep! OR you need a quick but exhausting yoga sequence to kick off our day.

Whatever it is that fits you most: Keep your mind clear and set an intention to have 8 hours of delicious sleep tonight. Unplug from all devices about 1 hour before you sleep.

FOCUS ON THE POSITIVE

Always imagining the worst case in every scenario is clinically known as catastrophic thinking and can increase anxiety and feelings of panic.

Rather than dwelling on negative aspects or outcomes, try to spend a few moments thinking positively. If your bathroom has flooded and you have to replace all the flooring, for example, this could be a very stressful situation. Yet try to focus on the fact that it gives you the opportunity to update and renovate, and the repairs should be covered by your insurance.

Staying optimistic allows your brain to avoid stress and stay calm.

Are you struggling being positive? Are you facing negative self-talk? Wait a minute. I’ve got something for you: click here to grab a free copy of my “POSITIVE MINDSET CHEATSHEET”.

PAUSE AND MEDITATED

Meditation has been proven to reduce stress and influence your brain waves over time so you can manage your emotions better and stay calm when you need to most.

If you think meditation is all about sitting cross-legged for hours and chanting “om”, you couldn’t be further from the truth – even a few minutes of sitting quietly and concentrating on your breathing is a beneficial form of meditation. You can also try apps like Headspace or 7Mind.

Personally I love guided meditations. You can easily find quiet a lot on YouTube and choose the ones that fit your needs! Click this link, to get to a free “Guided Meditation To Relax Your Mind and Release Stress” by amazing Merissa Peer. Or listen to this one … it’s a guided meditation for relaxation, positive energy and creativity by Mindvalley.

 

 

You can’t control what life will throw at you next, but you can learn to cope with pressurised situations and deal with stress in a healthy way.

Making an effort to practise some of these strategies the next time you feel under pressure can help you to feel calm and able to deal with any situation.

with all my love, Birgit

You got questions? Click this link and send me a message.

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Mastering Mindfulness: 3 Simple Practices for Busy, Deep-Thinking Women

In today’s fast-paced world, it’s easy to feel like life is slipping through your fingers. You’re managing your career, relationships, and personal aspirations—all while feeling disconnected from the present moment. If your mind is constantly wandering, jumping from to-do lists to future plans, you’re not alone. But what if you could reclaim that sense of calm and presence, even amid the chaos?

A wise man once said, “If you’re in your head, you’re dead.” While this might sound dramatic, it touches on an essential truth: if you’re constantly caught up in your thoughts, you’re missing out on life itself. As a high performer, you’re likely always thinking ahead, solving problems, and planning your next move. But being present is a form of power—it’s where clarity, creativity, and true connection live.

The good news? You don’t need to meditate for hours a day to cultivate mindfulness. In fact, you can start today with these three simple, yet powerful, practices to tap into the present moment.

#1. Focus on Your Breath to Anchor Yourself

When your thoughts are pulling you in a million directions, your breath is always there as a natural anchor to the present moment. By focusing on your in-breath and out-breath, you bring your attention to the here and now—calming your mind and centering your emotions.

Try this: Take 1-2 minutes during the day to practice belly breathing. Sit quietly, close your eyes, and place a hand on your belly. Inhale deeply through your nose, feeling your belly rise, and exhale slowly through your mouth, feeling your belly fall. This simple practice can create a profound sense of stillness.

Even if… your day feels overwhelming, just a few intentional breaths can ground you, helping you step back into your tasks with more clarity and focus.

#2. Engage Your Senses to Break the Cycle of Overthinking

It’s easy to get lost in thought, especially when you’re busy. One of the most effective ways to snap back into the present is to engage your senses. When you focus on what’s happening around you—what you can see, hear, and feel—you disrupt the mental loop of overthinking and root yourself in the now.

Try this: During everyday activities like walking or drinking coffee, engage your senses fully. What do you see? What can you hear around you? How does the texture of your clothes feel against your skin? Bringing your attention to these small sensory details shifts your awareness from your head to the world around you.

Even if… your mind is racing, grounding yourself in your senses can create a quick shift, allowing you to step out of the mental noise and into the peace of the moment.

#3. Surround Yourself with Present People to Elevate Your Mindfulness

Mindfulness can also be learned by spending time with people who are naturally present. These individuals exude calm, clarity, and a deep sense of connection, which can inspire you to bring more of that into your life.

Try this: Reflect on the people in your life who have a grounding presence. Spend more time with them or even observe how they stay present in moments of stress. You can also immerse yourself in the teachings of mindful thinkers like Eckhart Tolle. His works like “Stillness Speaks” and “The Flowering of Consciousness” are perfect for deepening your understanding of presence.

If you don’t have someone in your immediate circle, listen to guided meditations or watch videos of people who embody this quality. The tone of their voice and their demeanor can be incredibly grounding, helping you internalize that energy.

The Power of Small Moments

Being present in your life takes practice, and no one expects you to stay present all the time. The key is to start small. Set aside 15 minutes today—whether while washing the dishes, meditating, or even walking in nature. Notice how those small moments of presence begin to ripple into the rest of your day.

For me, walking in nature is one of my favorite ways to stay grounded. Cooking and baking also bring me into the present, allowing me to focus fully on the task at hand. Even simple activities like reading a book or relaxing with a cup of coffee can anchor me in the moment and clear the mental clutter.

What about you? What’s your favorite way to tap into the present moment? Share your thoughts in the comments below or send me a message—I’d love to hear from you!

PS: Ready to Dive Deeper?

If you’re struggling to stay present or feel disconnected from the now, maybe it’s time we had a conversation. Let’s work together to bring more mindfulness and clarity into your life. Reach out to me via email or drop a comment below.

Don’t forget to connect with me on Instagram @MrsBimako for more insights on mindfulness, balance, and personal growth. You can also check out these related articles:

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how a walk outside can boost your health and your success

Did you know?

Spending time outdoors, especially in green spaces, is one of the fastest ways 

to improve 

your health, 

your happiness 

and your productivity!

As much as a daily walk in the fresh air may seem like a waste of time at first glance… its benefits are also numerous: it has been shown to lower stress, blood pressure and heart rate, promote physical activity and lift mood and mental health!
Some research even suggests that green spaces are associated with a lower risk of developing psychiatric disorders – all findings that are now even taken seriously by the medical community…. – so why should we?

In 2019 a study published in the International Journal of Environmental Health Research   shows just how little time it takes to get the benefits of being outside:

Spending just 20 minutes in a park — even if you don’t exercise while you’re there — is enough to improve well-being, according to the research.

For the study, researchers surveyed 94 adults who visited one of three urban parks near Birmingham over the summer and fall. They were given fitness trackers to measure physical activity but were not told what to do in the park or how long to stay. Each person also answered questions about their life satisfaction and mood — which were used to calculate a subjective well-being score, with a maximum value of 55 — before and after their park visit. The average park visit lasted 32 minutes, and 30% of people engaged in at least moderate-intensity physical activity while there. Well-being scores rose during the park visit in 60% of people, with an average increase of about 1.5 points (from about 37 to 39).

Physical activity was not necessary to increase well-being, the study authors found, even though plenty of research suggests that exercise is great for your mental well-being, especially when it’s done outside! For many people in the study, simply being in green space seemed to be enough to spark a change, says study co-author Hon Yuen, director of research in the occupational therapy department at the University of Alabama at Birmingham.

“Some people may go to the park and just enjoy nature. It’s not that they have to be rigorous in terms of exercise,” Yuen says. “You relax and reduce stress, and then you feel more happy.”

As there are countless benefits of a walk outside… I’ll give you SIX:

A mindful walk in nature will clear your mind!

When you are close to your problems it is difficult to see the solutions. The mind is a powerful tool, but if it is overexercised, it loses its efficacy and can lead to poor decisions and lower productivity. Helping the mind step down from its state of endless frenzy can do wonders for your focus, productivity, and efficacy.

A walk outside has been proven to boost creativity and help increase the flow of new ideas by nearly 60 percent, while another study suggests that even simply looking outside for just 40 seconds at a time helped boost employee productivity throughout the workday.

Your mood will improve!

taking a walk of just 30min will lift your mood because any kind of exercise

signals your body to release endorphins, which improve mood and trigger positive feelings in the body.

Research has shown that going on regular walks improves your nervous system, leading to decreased levels of anger and hostility. Walking outdoors is even more beneficial: being in nature reduces tension and depression.

Even just looking at pictures of nature has been shown to increase feelings of positivity and emotional stability.

You’ll feel more creative

Spending time outdoors is a great way to get your creative juices flowing!

Whether you’re struggling with (writer’s block or can’t figure out the solution to a problem at work) taking a walk outside can help clear your mind and trigger new ideas.

Your skin will look younger

No, I’m not kidding. Daily walking increases your body’s production of collagen, which keeps your skin smooth and elastic.

You’ll increase your vitamin D levels

Walking outside exposes your skin to sunlight, which triggers your body to produce more vitamin D. Vitamin D deficiencies are common and can contribute to many diseases including Alzheimer’s disease, heart disease, and prostate cancer. Low vitamin D levels are also linked to depression, frequent illness, fatigue & muscle pain. Just don’t let yourself get burned.

You’ll have more fun

Spending time at the gym and staring at the same four walls can get really boring, isn’t it?

Actually people who engage in outdoor activity report greater satisfaction with and more enjoyment from their exercise program!

When you’re walking outside, you can always change the scenery to keep things interesting or try a different route to make your walk more challenging

So what are you waiting for? Go outside and  you catch some fresh air and let the sun kiss your nose!

To improve your (mental and physical) well-being AND your success never seemed to be easier

 

with all my love, Birgit

You got questions? Click this link and send me a message.

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